


what have I ever protected?

by AudreyV



Category: How to Get Away with Murder
Genre: Backstory, Gen, Hospitals, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, Origin Story, Psychological Trauma, Rape Aftermath, Young Bonnie
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-11
Updated: 2017-10-11
Packaged: 2019-01-16 00:58:04
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,309
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12332283
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AudreyV/pseuds/AudreyV
Summary: “My name is Annalise Keating. I'm a lawyer.” Annalise paused for a response. “Your roommate Diane called me. I helped her out of some trouble and I want to help you too, if you’ll let me.”A Bonnalise origin story.





	what have I ever protected?

**Author's Note:**

> Guys guys guys, 4x05 will have flashbacks to the Bonnalise origin story! I am SO EXCITED but this means the various fics I have in progress will soon be made obsolete by canon, so my plan is to finish and put a few up before that happens. 
> 
> I have so many feelings about the idea that Annalise was the first person to treat Bonnie like she was worth saving.
> 
> Rated M to be safe for discussions of violence.

“Jesus Christ detective, handcuffs?” Annalise glared daggers at the cop posted in the doorway. 

“She killed a police officer.”

“She defended herself during a violent assault,” Annalise shot back. She looked past the officer into the room. A girl sat stoically with her wrist shackled to the metal side of the hospital bed, head bent down and dishwater blonde hair falling across her face. Monitors beeped and an IV was taped to one arm. 

“She's not a flight risk,” Annalise argued. “She's not a threat. So let her loose, unless you're telling me you're terrified of a nineteen year old girl who’s barely 100 lbs and has three broken ribs.”

The cop towered over her and and glared, obviously not inclined to take orders from a woman, much less a black one who was also a defense attorney with barely 5 years experience under her belt. She glanced back to the girl, saw her rocking herself gently and staring at nothing. Annalise drew herself up to her full height and dropped her voice low. 

“Take them off, or I will make sure you're personally named in the million-dollar lawsuit I'm going to slap your department with, Officer Johnson."

Johnson sighed but moved toward the bed. He unlocked the cuffs while keeping a wary eye on Annalise. 

“You know, rape is a good cover story if you kill a man during rough sex,” Johnson said, directing it at the girl in the bed, voice dripping with judgement. 

“Thanks for the tip on the prosecution’s strategy,” Annalise growled. “Now get out. I need to speak to my client alone.”

She planted herself in the chair next to the hospital bed and glared at the wrinkled back of Johnson’s uniform shirt as he stalked away. 

She turned to the bed and smiled in what she hoped was a reassuring manner. She worried it might look more like a tense baring of her teeth, but it didn't matter. The girl’s eyes were focused on the indentations on her thin wrists. 

“My name is Annalise Keating. I'm a lawyer.” Annalise paused for a response. “Your roommate Diane called me. I helped her out of some trouble and I want to help you too, if you’ll let me.”

“I don't have any money.”

“Doesn't matter. A woman defends herself against an assault, then gets arrested for being fortunate enough to walk away? Bullshit. I’d defend you pro bono.”

“Really?” A wary pale face turned toward Annalise, who noticed splotches of blood still clinging to her cheeks. Annalise could feel the girl sizing her up. 

“Defending the girl who made sure a sadistic cop wouldn't rape anyone else, wouldn't use his power to subdue and assault because he thinks that badge is a license to take what he wants? That's the kind of case every defense attorney wants.”

“Why?” The girl’s eyes narrowed. “What's really in it for you?”

Annalise considered several lies that would make her seem more altruistic, but she decided the truth would stand up better under scrutiny. 

“It's going to be a media circus,” she said. “Getting you acquitted paints me as champion of a victim the system failed. A defense attorney who might have a moral compass is a hot commodity, Miss Winterbottom.”

The girl nodded and finally met Annalise’s eyes. 

“That I believe,” she said quietly. “And it’s just Bonnie. So how much trouble am I in?”

“You don't have priors, which is good, but you left with him. They'll say the sex was consensual and Officer Scumbag isn't here for them to ask his opinion. They’ll probably argue you entrapped him and the whole thing was an elaborate plot to steal his badge or his wallet.”

“I know it looks bad,” Bonnie mumbled. 

“Not to me. I can fix this. So am I hired?”

“Okay.”

“Good." Annalise leaned slightly back in the seat and steeled herself for what came next. "Can you tell me what happened?”

“I was at a bar. This guy started talking to me. He was nice. Most of the time I'm invisible to guys but…” Bonnie trailed off, shrugged and pulled her arms close to her body.  “He offered to drive me home. Said he was a police officer so I could trust him. I should have known better.”

“Stop. None of this is your fault.”

“I realized I didn't know where we were, it didn't look familiar at all. Not many street lights. I asked him where we were going and he said he’d gotten lost but he’d figured it out. But then he pulled into this empty parking lot." Bonnie's gaze dropped back down to her hands. "He told me to get in the back of the car, and I did. Then he… got in the back with me.”

“You’ll have to recount the awful details over and over again in this process, but for now skip ahead to when you hit him.”

“He was on top of me, I kept trying to move, to get away, but he just held me there, tighter and tighter. I reached out for anything I could use to make him stop and found the nightstick.”

“Do you know where his gun was at the time?” Annalise asked.

“I think he left it in the front seat.”

“Why was the nightstick in the back?”

“He…” Bonnie took a shaky breath and rubbed the back of her neck. When she looked back up at Annalise she was calmer, and when she spoke her words were flat, all business. “He held me down by pressing it against my shoulders, then my neck. But as he… got more into it, he must have dropped it. So I grabbed it and I hit him.”

“How many times?”

“So many. Over and over,” she said, her voice cracking. “As many times as I could.” 

“And then?”

“I got out of the car and found my phone. I called Diane. I wanted to call 911 but—” 

“You thought they’d send the police.” Annalise offered Bonnie a box of tissues.

“Yes."  Bonnie took one and wiped her face, then balled it up in her fist. "So Diane called.”

“She insisted the paramedics be the first responders," Annalise said.  "She seems like a good friend.”

“I guess. It's dumb. She didn't need to go to all that trouble. It wasn't even that bad this time.”

Annalise’s breath hitched at the implication, but she filed the information away in her brain and moved on. 

“What makes this time different?” she asked. 

“I thought he was going to kill me.” Bonnie shrugged like it was nothing. “I hoped he would.”

“That's a lie," Annalise said evenly. "If you really believed that, you'd be dead in that parking lot right now. You fought back, because you're strong. And now you’re not alone.”

“You’ll forgive me if I don’t believe strangers when they say nice things to me.”

“That’s fair. But I’m going to fix this for you, because you don’t deserve to be in a prison cell. I get it, the world’s used you as its punching bag for years, but I’m telling you, that can stop today. Let me help.” Annalise reached out and offered her hand. After a moment of hesitation, Bonnie took it. 

“You really think you can save me?” she asked.

“I can keep you out of prison. After that, you’ll save yourself.”

A decade later, Annalise would remember the way Bonnie’s face crumpled, and how she scrambled into Annalise’s arms like it was the only thing that could save her. Some nights after a few too many vodkas, Annalise would reassure herself that she'd done the right thing, that she hadn't saved Bonnie from one nightmare just to drag her down into another. 

That she hadn't ruined Bonnie the moment she wrapped her arms around Bonnie’s bruised, shaking body and held on tight. 


End file.
